Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Who Is "Steve"?

I went back to read "Not In Vain", and someone commented on it. It said "Steve". Who is this person? Is there someone else who shares my grief? Or are you someone I know? Please reveal yourself.

Meanwhile, I try everyday to go forward as you'd want me to. Some days are harder than others. I often wonder if you'd approve of how I handle things since you've been gone. I tell myself that you would be proud of me no matter what. I try to recall our conversations when you would tell me how much I contribute to this world. I know there are no guarantees in life, but I want so much to succeed and make you proud. Oh, Mom, I miss the times we shared. My Scrabble game and Yahtzee sit untouched. The tears well in my eyes knowing we will never play again. What am I supposed to do now for a friend? You are gone and I am lonely. But I know I must go on. Once you said that when you died you knew that I'd die with you, I feel I have. I am alone as you once were, so I will try to do as you once did. It breaks my heart to know that you were so alone, I feel now the way you must have felt. I love and miss you Mom. I hope you're in a place where you are happy, I hope someday that I will join you there.

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